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| Lil B @ 19 Months |
...THIS is what adoption means to our family! A tiny, blue eye'd, red-ish haired, PERFECT little boy!
In February 2010 we decided that God had led our minds and hearts towards adoption long enough. It was time for us to do something. Adoption had never not been an option for us. We had always talked of adoption, possibly even while we were dating. Honestly, taking the first step of contacting an agency wasn't even that scary to us. {I totally attribute this to God.} We called and said, "let's get started."
After prayerful consideration we knew that domestic adoption was the only option for our family at that point. We thought domestic was cheaper....uuhhh, ok, we were wrong, its all pricey, but God is faithful ;)....and we knew that Ben's job wouldn't allow for extended times away. Over the next 7 months we checked every box off the to do list from paperwork, to state mandated training {very long, and sometimes painfully boring}, to fingerprinting, to background checks, then blood work, next to the certificate that said our dog was up-to-date on her shots, then more paperwork, and finally the last step...our home study. Phew! We were done and officially "waiting" by the end of August.
We breezed through the fall, Thanksgiving and Christmas not even really feeling antsy. We knew in our hearts that when God had chosen the child that needed to be in our family He would let us know. {I can't say that if months and months had gone by with nothing I wouldn't have doubted.} To our surprise we got a call just 2 days after Christmas about a 4 week old baby boy in Texas.
Here is were the story is a little different than many. When we received the call it wasn't to tell us that we had been chosen. It was a call from another agency looking for a family that was willing to take a child that could possibly have osteogensis imperfecta....imper-what? Brittle Bone Disease.
Back up...Somewhere in that ream of paperwork that we filled out there was this 6 page checklist of "things" we had to decide if we would consider or would not consider in a child. This by far was the. single. hardest. form we filled out. There were 133 different scenarios that we had to decide if we would "take." Let me list a few just so you can get an idea of how very hard this was:
- Child:
- Race
- Gender
- Age
- Number - YES, we would have taken twins...or more! :)
- Health
- problems at birth, handicaps: both correctable or non correctable, drugs at birth, severe allergies, cancer, diabetes, hemophilia, heart disease or defect, epilepsy, brain damage, down's syndrome, autism, cerebral palsy, spina bifida, venereal disease, sickle cell anemia, major loss of sight or hearing, fetal alcohol syndrome, condition which could be terminal, result of incest or rape, retardation, developmentally delayed, learning disabilities...
- Family Background:
- Retardation
- Mental/Emotional Problems
- Physical Disabilities
- allergies, cancer, heart disease, heart defect, asthma, diabetes, hemophilia, kidney disease, hypertension, autism, cerebral palsy, sickle cell anemia....the list goes on and on
- Natural Parents:
- Mother: no prenatal care, smoked, drank alcohol or used drugs during pregnancy {marijuana, heroin, cocaine, codeine, hallucinogenics, valium, prescription drugs}
- Mental Emotional Problems
- Physical Disabilities {same list as above + a few like STD's, HIV & AIDS}
- Father: all the same as the mother
Y'ALL, this list, it was killer! The first time I read through it all I could think was what if this was my own biological child? How could I NOT take any of these! Even if it was something like drug usage or some other disease that a child could get from the mother...it sure wasn't that child's fault. How could I not love ANY child that God chose for me to love!
God is big enough that I can love my children AND love & embrace their birth families without fear or insecurity. For they too where made in God's image. Johnston Moore
Brittle Bone Disease...I'd heard of it before. Although they gave us overnight to think and pray about it, I could have told them before the phone conversation ended that our answer would be an overwhelming YES. Yes! When can we go pick him up, YES!
This agency had contacted several agencies looking for families, like us, who were willing to love a child with a health consideration. So, again we waited. Other families had to have time to submit their "stuff" so they could be considered as well. I know I said I was being patient...at this point I might have been a little impatient. Over the entire previous 11 months I never once became impatient. For the following 3 weeks I couldn't get this sweet baby boy off my mind. Here is one of the great "God" things that happened during this journey... I knew that this little boy was special. I knew that whatever family he ended up in was EXACTLY where God wanted him to be. I knew if it he wasn't part of my family I would be sad, but not heart broken....because God has a plan. And, I trust Him! I was totally at peace in my heart with the fact that God's great and mighty plan would play out in the end. {This is so unlike me. That's why I know it was a God thing.}
Finally, on January 17, 2011 HE WAS OURS! We had a new son! Little B.
Over the next 3 weeks we prepared for a new baby. Im talking about the kind of preparing most people have 9 months to do. I sorted and washed baby clothes that my sister and my friends were so kind to share with me. I made, yes made, baby bedding. I cleaned...every mother has that nesting stage. :) I did everything I could to prepare for this precious boy.
Also during that 3 weeks I had the privilege to start my relationship with Little B and the foster family he had been staying with for the first 7 weeks of his life. Ill save that story for another day. Its an amazing one too. You'll definitely want to come back for that one.
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| He met us via the internet...the www is such a handy little tool :) |
Some may wonder why its says Our First Adoption Story...well, I sure hope it isn't our last! Im pretty sure James 1:27 was talking to me.
I know its not God's last adoption story. God has an adoption story with each and every one of us. He has adopted us so that we may be in relationship with him. Why do we adopt? So that our children may be in relationship with Him!! Adoption isn't what we do. It's what God does with our family.
Adoption wasn't just an "option," it was God's best!
For I know the plans I have for you, Little B, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all of your heart. Jeremiah 29: 11-13
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